in the itc.

there's a girl next to me who must be a pe major (my gut reaction confirmed by the 300-level pe class she's taking) who is writing a paper entitled "discovering hatha yoga." it makes me happy, and in only a little bit of an i'm-an-asian-studies-major condescending sort of way.

INTERNATIONAL DANCE PARTY

who: people all across the country, including you
what: dance party
where: wherever you are
when: tomorrow - saturday night, 12 midnight est (9pm pst)
why: because dance parties are awesome
how: turn up your music player of choice. play the first song (agenda suicide) from the faint's "danse macabre" at wherever you are. dance accordingly. take pictures and send them to me.

"Haha. I was kind of wondering if you'd find that reply. Excellent. Zaijian."

now, interpret.

If a boy sends you this poem, is it appropriate to read something into it?

If so, how much?

as of sunday, i am a free bird.

Okay, if you ask me, I'd debate the "long, lustrous history" of China that people talk about all the time. China wasn't even unified until Qin Shi Huang Di. Granted, that's still a long history, but certainly not 3500+ years, either. Plus, I don't understand the continuity granted throughout all the dynastic changes. Most problematic for me is the Qing dynasty - several hundred years of Manchu rule over the Han. It was an invasion! Nobody would call the British invasion of India, for example, part of Indian history in the same way Chinese people speak of theirs. (Or talk proudly about Native American history after the "discovery" of the Americas.) Obviously the analogy doesn't hold up under scrutiny, but you know what I mean.

Furthermore, I'm baffled by the cultural unity that Chinese people brag about when I see laobeijingren hate nanfangren and taiwanren hate mainlanders and back and forth. Bah. I spent the summer working for a an educated Taiwanese boss who only ever talked about how morally bankrupt mainlanders are and how I would hate China and how it's so unsafe and filthy and evil and now I have a very educated Chinese professor from Beijing who only talks about how stupid and uneducated and barbaric southerners are. Besides, culture is so different in the north than the south than the west - I think food illustrates that well, especially in China. (True, the differences - food and otherwise - exist in America too, but I certainly don't feel any sort of cultural unity with people in New York or Nebraska or Louisiana or Alaska.)

So: enlighten me. I'm posting this here so the bijiao congming de Chu family will help me out on this one.

Date:	2006-04-07 00:54
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	sore

i got punched in the jaw today.

by a puppy.

with a broken leg.

i can't open my mouth wider than talking-width. is that a bad sign?

in other news, i think i'm going vegan.

somewhere i have never travelled,gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look easily will unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skillfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me,i and
my life will shut very beautifully,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;

nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the colour of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what is is about you that closes
and opens; only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

spring is almost here. it's trying really hard.

i was at paul's house all weekend and now i am exausted, behind on schoolwork, and skipping class.

anyway, i'm going to go study. livejournal is fun.

i'm home. yay. it's pretty nice. a little too comfortable.

that's pretty much it.

Even
After
All this time
The sun never says to the earth,

"You owe
me"

Look
What happens
With a love like that,
It lights the
Whole
Sky.

Date:	2005-11-02 23:45
Subject:	this is the last you'll ever hear of this, but:
Security:	Public
Mood:	...what?

and just like that... the tables have turned.

what goes around comes around, i guess.

so - did you laugh? i did. kind of like the time i was wakeboarding and i landed, face first, on my teeth. i laughed like a fool. what else can you do?

Date:	2005-09-13 02:34
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	frustrated

why do i even bother being honest? it always backfires. god damn it.

Date:	2005-09-11 21:23
Subject:	random
Security:	Public
Mood:	introspective
Music:	bright eyes - lifted...

a few things.

HOLY SHIT I'M IN CHINA.

i really love bright eyes. their lyrics resonate with me.

today at dinner we were talking about religion, and my roomate jokingly said, "yeah i can't tell if you're a christian or not by the way you act." i said, "well, i can't tell if i'm a christian or not, so there you go." and i was thinking about that, as i've feeling a little bad about the state of my spiritual life (or lack thereof) - but at least i'm being true to what i know. right? thoughts?

back to the first paper of the semester. it's only a 3 pg reflection paper, but the first one is always so hard. i have yet to find my groove.

Date:	2005-07-26 19:30
Subject:	my heart feels full. finally.
Security:	Public
Mood:	content

http://postsecret.blogspot.com/

I'm living my own nightmare. How could I have let this happen?

I am so, so sorry.

does anybody (coughdavecough) know where atwood, ontario is?

Date:	2005-07-02 02:09
Subject:	new hair
Security:	Public
Mood:	happy

well, i'm never doing that again.

Have you guys seen magician/"mentalist" Alain Nu? The guy was blowing my mind. If anybody has seen him or knows his secrets, let me know so I can sleep at night.